One Month to Go

(no new medical news here—just some lengthy reflections)

As you can see, I’m still getting a-round but slowing down. It’s hard to believe that in less than a month, we will have a baby. I’m very grateful for my good health during this pregnancy, but quite honestly, it has been a long 9 months! I originally thought this pregnancy would go by faster than my first because I would be distracted taking care of a busy toddler, but because of the worry and preparations for a baby with serious heart problems, my pregnancy has been on my mind so much more and it seems like I have been pregnant forever.

I feel like there are always things racing through my mind. I have a dozen mental lists of things to do— preparing for baby, arranging care for Natalie, taking care of doctors visits, bills and insurance, thinking of names—but I usually forget what I need to write down before I get the thoughts on paper.

In addition, I find myself awake for a few hours in the middle of the night at least once a week. This was typical with my other pregnancy, too. Sometimes it’s useful to have this extra time to write in my journal or attend to other things on the computer, since Natalie is too demanding to let me do it during the day. But I am sure I would rather be sleeping so I have energy for all the things I need to do during the day.

With so much constantly running through my mind, please forgive me if I am forgetful, flaky, scatterbrained, slow to return phone calls and email, agitated, insensitive, and/or supersensitive. Some of it is typical pregnancy emotions and some is from the frenzy I feel trying to get ready for the baby and anticipating the many possibilities that lie ahead. I often feel like I can deal with whatever challenges are in store, but it would be nice to know beforehand exactly what those challenges will be. Many thanks to those who have offered to help with Natalie or give support in other ways. I’m starting to recognize how to delegate and take people up on their offers of help as we are now approaching the time where that help is needed. It is a comfort to know of the many prayers offered for us.